The holidays can be a time of fond memories, and a time of anticipation. We look forward to the traditional holiday foods, get-togethers with family and friends, and special activities set-aside just for the holidays. At the same time, the holidays can be a time of added demands and stresses, including familial, social and financial. For the individual who has succeeded in overcoming addiction, it can be a time of special concerns and challenges.
Celebrating with Recovering Addicts
Those individuals who have succeeded in maintaining long-term sobriety have managed the challenge of a minefield of temptations and opportunities to use drugs or alcohol which routinely present themselves at holiday social gatherings. But for those who are more newly recovered from their addiction, there are a number of things they can do to help their loved one get through the holiday season safely, comfortably and with some happiness.
The newly-recovered addict will be faced with the increased expectations of the holiday season, may likely already be facing a less-than-optimum personal and/or financial situation, while at the same time learning to live life without the substance on which they have depended–and the lifestyle which was its focus.
As most of us have experienced, the holidays hold both the happiness and joys stemming from families and their traditions—and especially keen for the former addict–the less comfortable emotions of the season which stem from losses, hard feelings, resentments and regrets attendant to substance abuse and the damage caused to self and others.
On a brighter note, many who are in the early stages of recovery after overcoming addiction will experience the sharing of the holidays with family or friends as a source of stability and strength; offering the person an opportunity to once again connect-up with people they care about as well as further restore relationships.
How You Can Help
There are some basic things you can do, both as an individual in early recovery and as a family that will help to ensure that each person involved has the opportunity for a safe, sober and more pleasant holiday season. It can be the beginning of new holiday traditions, and the beginning of once again celebrating the holidays together.
Here are some things the individual in recovery can do:
- Make a holiday plan. For the person in early recovery, it is one which includes the meetings you attend; and maintaining your routine contact with any mentors or sponsors, clergy our counselors whom you know to be a central part of your recovery.
- Know yourself. Remain aware of any signs of potential relapse you may be experiencing, and take the actions you know help you get through it safely.
- Plan ahead for any situations you may encounter which pose a risk to your sobriety, and know what actions you will take to protect your sobriety. If you know there are situations which post too much risk—then avoid them totally.
- Keep in mind that no matter how unpleasant a social situation might be–it is never worth risking your hard-won sobriety. Just “ride on over it”.
Here are some things families can do:
- Always keep in mind that recovery and sobriety comes first. Be aware that your friend or family member may need to miss a holiday get-together or event in order to protect their newly and hard-won sobriety. Respect and honor their desire to safeguard their sobriety.
- If there will be alcohol served at a holiday get-together, find out from the person in recovery if he or she is comfortable with that; and on the flipside of that–also comfortable with you hosting an alcohol-free get-together because of their attendance.
- Let the person in recovery know that they are welcome to invite a person or other people they know who does not drink. It may be that the person would like to invite friends who are also in recovery, and help them share a sober holiday, too.
Remember that each person is a distinct individual, and their addiction recovery experiences are uniquely their own. Talk to your friend or family member; listen to what they have to say. Together, with understanding and agreement, a safe and sober holiday season can be enjoyed by all.
Source:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/2012/12/21/celebrating-holidays-recovering-family-members-and-friends