I Have Been Clean for 12 Years and Now I Help Others

Growing up in Murray, Kentucky, I was the youngest of three children. I was spoiled, but I also experienced childhood trauma. My family was dysfunctional, to say the least. It was a rural life as a kid—we lived on a farm with cows, horses, ducks, pigs, and a tobacco patch. I loved working in the tobacco patch. My mom would cook big meals and bring them to the field so we could eat dinner outside.

One especially happy memory I have is from when I was 8 or 9 years old. We went on a trip to Six Flags with my sister, my brother, and his family. It was a good family time together.

I had my first drink when I was 12 years old. It was at a family function and the kids were cleaning up after the party. I got a little buzz from it, and I liked the way it made me feel—it was calm from the trauma and made me feel comfortable in my own skin.

A month or two later, I went to my dad’s house, gathered some of his beers in a bag, and drank four of them. I fell down and thought it was the best thing ever.

Not long after, I started smoking weed at 13 or 14 years old. I was an athlete, so I tried not to use during basketball season because it always made me feel bad afterward. But from that point on, I was always smoking and drinking. In my 20s, it got worse. I had tried cocaine, and when I was 22, I did meth for the first time. Someone slipped it to me at a party—I thought it was cocaine. I was instantly in love, but I also knew it was a real problem because I wanted more. I battled with drugs and was using Adderall in college to cope.

I got married, dropped out of college, got divorced, and then went back to school. That’s when I got into meth again.

I began using opiates, taking meth intravenously, and eventually started dealing and trafficking meth too. Drugs destroyed my life. I overdosed several times—I’m lucky to be alive. I had car accidents, possession and trafficking charges, and everything that comes along with that lifestyle. After a probation violation, my mom said to find somewhere far, far away for me to go. My niece started researching and found Narconon Arrowhead.

The sauna program sounded good, so I went. I completed the program and stayed for a while to train and work afterward. It was a good experience.

When I arrived in Withdrawal, I didn’t mention I’d been heavily using opiates, so I was really sick. I was severely undernourished, but the food was good—with lots of fruits and vegetables. That was definitely what I needed, and the care I received was good.

After completing the sauna program, I felt so much better. It was wonderful—I felt physically better than I had in years, and my mental clarity was exceptional. At the time, I weighed quite a bit, but I felt so good after sauna that I kept losing weight. I still use the sauna and exercise regularly. My lifestyle is completely different now.

One of the biggest gains I had during the program was achieving substantial sober time. I had four to five months clean—something I hadn’t achieved since I was 12 years old. It was a big deal for me.

On one step of the program, where you write down your past wrongdoings, I realized how much I lied. That was a major turning point for me in general. My viewpoint changed and I had a morality shift.

I have been clean for 12 years, and now I help others. I created a nonprofit, year-long, non-residential recovery program where people in recovery can work and give back. It’s been going strong for six years, and we’re now looking for a new property to expand.

“I’ve created a life I want to be present in. I’m now a trusted and respected member of my community. I was even named a Kentucky Colonel, nominated by the Governor of Kentucky.”

I’m nearly finished with my Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor certification, and I am wrapping up my CEUs. I’ve created a life I want to be present in. I’m now a trusted and respected member of my community. I was even named a Kentucky Colonel, nominated by the Governor of Kentucky.

I help a lot of people get sober—and God helped me do that.

I’m proud to be able to show up for my family and be there for them. There’s been a lot of trauma, but also a lot of forgiveness and understanding. I’m now an active member of my family instead of a nuisance.

The best part about being clean is getting to live life—showing up, being part of my community, and not being separate from it.

Holly C., Narconon Arrowhead Graduate