11 Years Sober, Living the American Dream

I was born and raised in Bogalusa, Louisiana. I had a great life. I had a great childhood with a home of two parents who provided for me. It was a middle-class, small-town life with parents that were local business owners. I had everything I needed.
I remember that I was happiest when I was playing football in high school. I remember one game we should have lost; the other team was a lot better and the odds were against us on paper. But my team really clicked and somehow, we pulled off a win.
Graduating high school was, at that point in my life, my biggest accomplishment. Education is often intangible but having a high school diploma was something I could put my hands on, but I had started partying and drinking in my senior year of high school. When I went to college the parties became more frequent and I would drink alcohol and smoke weed. Then, I started selling opiates in college. This progressed, on the weekends I started occasionally using the pills myself. This was the true start of my downfall.
For several years I was a “high functioning” addict. No one knew about my addiction other than those I chose to tell. My family didn’t know, though they probably suspected something was not right. I graduated college and had to go out and find a real job and support myself. That got real hard and I realized I had an issue. I couldn’t quit. For the longest time I tried to kid myself, saying: “I don’t have a problem. I can quit anytime. I just choose to continue”
Being in a small town I was always fearful that I would fail a drug test or get arrested and bring unwanted attention to my family.
I couldn’t hold a healthy relationship with a girlfriend.
Every day it was more important to me to work out how I was going to pay for and buy drugs than it was to eat and sleep.
I was using for 5 years before I finally told my family I had a problem and needed help. It then took about another 5 years to find a program that worked. The program that worked was Narconon. During that intervening time, I had upgraded to IV and was using heroin. Each time I tried to get clean the relapse was mentally and physically harder.
During those five years before I found Narconon, the last time I relapsed, almost in a matter of 30 seconds I had lost my job, my house and my girlfriend. I lost a whole lot real quick.
I started to get sick from opiate withdrawal. I remember a time when my mom mentioned that she had to accept the fact that her son was always going to be a junkie. Thus, I made a decision at that point; I didn’t know what to do, but I had to do something. I couldn’t live like this. So, I started looking for a program and I found and called Narconon of Oklahoma. I went to my parents in one last attempt. I told them that I had spoken to Narconon and that I needed to go, to get away. I begged them to give me one more shot. I am thankful they did.
The staff were phenomenal. Most of them had been where I was. I wasn’t talking to somebody who only read a book. I walked in and heard people laughing and talking. People were genuinely happy. I remember it was like I was outside a bubble looking in. I wanted what they had. I realized that being sober, you can be happy. At that point I hadn’t been happy in 10 plus years. There were moments I thought I was happy but it was not true happiness.
After I did the sauna program, I felt rejuvenated. Once I made it through that I knew I was done with drugs. I felt I was in the best shape of my life. I had a realization about how all things I had been ingesting into my body was hurting me – the crime, the sickness. It was almost like a weight attached to me that I couldn’t get rid of. And then I was able to do so.
After I went through one of the parts of the program, I had control of myself, my life and how it played out. This plays a part in any decision making I do and I still use it.
Once I got honest with myself I was able to handle things from my past that for so long I had been running from.
Another important gain is being able to see a situation and predict. I can see if something is not a good situation or ideal environment and if not, I don’t have to stay there. I don’t have to depend on anyone else.
My graduation was probably equal to if not more important to my high school and college graduation.
I am proud of being drug free, being sober and handling life. I have been for 11 years now. I was able to overcome what I had lost.
“My family never stopped loving me. Now there is no question about where I stand. They offer to do things for me just because they want to and because they are proud. Now I have 2 kids, a wife and a home on 15 acres. I’m living the American dream.”

My relationship with my family is fantastic. My family never stopped loving me. Now there is no question about where I stand. They offer to do things for me just because they want to and because they are proud. Now I have 2 kids, a wife and a home on 15 acres. I’m living the American dream.
I like the person I am now versus who I was on drugs. My favorite thing about being drug free is being me.
For anyone suffering from addiction, even though sobriety may seem a distant reality it is possible. You have to take that giant leap and reach out for help. Just start the process. And then stay true to what you know. Always be in a position where you can look at the person in mirror. If you can’t confront yourself then you can’t confront life.
Patrick L., Narconon Arrowhead Graduate