Since Doing the Narconon Program My Relationship With My Dad and Family Is Better Than Ever

 

I was born in Dover, NH and was raised between Huntsville, AL and San Antonio TX. I spent my high school years in San Antonio. I grew up middle-class and my parents were great. I had a wonderful life growing up as the oldest of 3 with a younger brother and sister. I was involved in sports while growing up. In high school I was on the debate team and travelled all over. One of my favorite memories before drinking was getting my driver’s license and another was getting my first pet.

I was always a little introverted and shy and I didn’t always have the most self-confidence. I think that’s where drinking came in, to give me self-confidence. It let me let my hair down and I wasn’t so introverted. I had my first drink at age 15 on New Year’s Eve at a family member’s house party. I was out with my mom the next day and I was so sick I had to pull over to throw up. I told my mom it was bad Chick-fil-A. After that, I didn’t touch one sip of alcohol until age 20 or 21. I started smoking marijuana around age 16. At age 18 when I went camping on a friend’s land, the police were called and I was arrested for possession. I quit smoking pot within a couple of months, but within a year or two I was drinking again.

My life turned upside down because of drinking. Over 7-8 years I lost friends and disconnected from various family members. I moved from Texas to Alaska during that time, and that also caused loss of contact. I couldn’t hold stable relationships where people could count on me. Holding a job was difficult and they were usually short-term like waiting tables. I got 2 DUIs. I missed big family gatherings because I was too intoxicated to drive. I missed the last Thanksgiving and the last Christmas with 2 grandparents. My parents had many sleepless nights because of worrying about me.

I knew I needed a rehab. During my first summer in Alaska for seasonal work, I had a co-worker for a roommate who was a Narconon graduate. He was a big influence. He was a few years older than I was and I sort of looked up to him. I had considered rehab previously, but didn’t have the funds for it. This time my parents were able to pay for the program and a week or two later I was at Narconon Arrowhead. They flew someone to Alaska to meet me and then fly back with me.

When I arrived I was pretty disoriented and scared, didn’t know how long I was going to be there, what I would be doing, or what type of people I would meet there. I was against 12 step programs so I was a little worried about what I was going to be doing. I went right to the withdrawal area and everyone was super nice. My room was comfortable and I had people to talk to. I knew that I was in the place that I needed to be to get the help I needed. I was committed to being there.

My biggest win came from the sauna program. It was amazing the difference in how I felt between starting and ending it.

Graduation isn’t a specific memory, but I remember going to others’ graduations and being excited for them. Around the time I finished I was excited and felt like doors were no longer locked or closed to me.

Since doing the Narconon program my relationship with my dad and family is better than ever. He doesn’t have to worry about me anymore. I met my wife about 3 1/2 years after the program and we’ll be married 8 years in July. I own and operate a VR entertainment center in Alaska. My wife and I are looking forward to having children in a few years.

The concept of telling myself daily wins is something that I still use. I also, when I have something I don’t understand, go back before and find what it was that I didn’t understand and study it. I still use the ability to be present, ok, and calm.

My proudest accomplishment is supporting my wife and enabling her to follow her career path with law school. We were in different states for extended periods and travelling back and forth. Watching her excel in law school and watching her walk across the stage and knowing that I had a hand in making that happen made me very proud.

“I didn’t think I would ever be able to

quit drinking, but I did…”

I didn’t think I would ever be able to quit drinking, but I did. Now my favorite things about being sober are clarity, mornings that I don’t wake up with a hangover, being able to be ok with myself and who I am and not needing a crutch or something to lean on.

If you’re fighting addiction and it’s something that you really want to end, if you really want to overcome it, it’s ok to ask for help. You should ask for help. You can get help. It’s something you can certainly overcome, beat, leave behind. It takes a lot and it’s best to go at it with support.

Families should try to make sure there is a good environment to return to and to support them as they go out and try to rebuild their lives. If families can’t help, you need to make sure you set yourself up for success by building friendships, new habits, and new ways of doing things. Keep moving forward.

James P., Narconon Arrowhead 2011 Graduate